


Part of the family

by protectmikasamuels2017



Category: Derry Girls (TV)
Genre: Gen, Mentions of Abortion, Other characters mentioned - Freeform, mentions of drug abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:02:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25015927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/protectmikasamuels2017/pseuds/protectmikasamuels2017
Summary: All Deirdre could really and honestly focus on was one thing:James' father was coming back to Derry.And she wasn't sure how she was going to fucking manage it.
Comments: 7
Kudos: 100





	Part of the family

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, when I first started to write this I was like 'ok, I've got to make this sound Irish, how do Irish people talk?' The next thought that came into my head was 'wait a minute, I am Irish!' And then finally 'but I don't even talk like that.' So yeah it was a bit of a struggle getting the voice right. Any Irish people who write for Derry Girls answer me this: is it like that for you too?
> 
> Possible trigger warning just before you start reading there are mentions of abortion and drug use in this. Nothing graphic but it is there, so if you are triggered by this, then maybe be careful.
> 
> If you like it then please leave a comment, I love comments.

Deirdre swallowed her whiskey with a tired sigh as she thought about the most recent news that she had heard from Sarah McCool. Daire Donnelly was coming back to Derry. Apparently he was overseeing the development of some branch of some company. She hadn’t paid attention to the details, her mind had been lost in the first piece of information.

James’ father was coming back to Derry. And she wasn’t sure just how she was going to fucking manage it.

Even though it was almost twenty years ago by now, she still remembered the way that Daire and Kathy had carried on when they were younger. The two of them had been a part of a whole big group. Going out drinking every night, getting into all sorts of trouble (and more than likely drugs too), none of them having the slightest notion of settling down. Thinking that they could take on the world. And ever since they were wains Kathy and Daire had constantly been on and off, like cats and dogs at the best of times, seeing other people at the same time as they were seeing each other.

And then Kathy fell pregnant and in possibly one of the only moments of sibling affection that they had ever had, she had confided to her that Daire was the father.

She hadn’t wanted the baby. Kathy had plans; she wanted to get out of Derry, go to London or Dublin or even New York. She didn’t want a council house, a marriage to Daire Donnelly, never mind the fact that the Donnelly’s were of good stock and wee ones weren’t on her mind. Not then and probably not ever. Her mind was made up and nothing anyone could say would change her mind. Not her, not their parents, not the priest, nobody.

Not that Daire didn’t try though. He wanted her to keep the baby, he had wanted so badly to be a father. He and Gerry Quinn were the same like that; born for the role really. He had tried everything, begging, proposing, even saying that she could leave the baby to him to raise alone. Nothing had worked. 

So her sister had packed her bags and went to London for the abortion. And never came back. Which if Deirde was being honest with herself, she had kind of expected that. She was out, and if Kathy had her way then she’d never come back either.

Any contact that she and her parents did have with her sister afterwards was like pulling teeth. Kathy wasn’t one for keeping in touch and she wasn’t one for sharing intimate details of her private life with anyone. It was something that they had in common actually. But for feck's sake at least she fucking kept Kathy informed about Michelle and other important things! She on the other hand hadn’t even know that Kathy had changed her mind about the abortion until James was already three years old and that was only because she overheard him playing when she was on the phone to Kathy. And if she hadn’t told their parents about their grandson, then they wouldn’t even known that Kathy had changed her mind on the abortion until Kathy had rang to tell them that she was getting married.

And that’s more information than Kathy had ever given Daire or the rest of Derry either. Time and time again Deirde had wondered if she should tell Daire that Kathy had changed her mind about the abortion, that he had a son, but she kept her mouth shut. 

First off it wasn’t her business so she wasn’t going to involve herself in the shitstorm that would result from that. Second was that Kathy was already seeing Paul by the time she found out. If Daire was told the truth about James then he would want to track her down and having Kathy on the phone and screaming at her was top of the list of things she wanted to avoid. And lastly and most importantly, in the years that followed after Kathy left Derry, Daire had become a major drug addict.

God that whole thing had been fucking ugly to watch. She was a nurse and every day she had to see up-front just what drugs did both to the person and to their family. She wasn’t going to foist that kind of life onto a child. God only knows what kind of mother Kathy was but she knew it probably wasn’t a good one. And she wasn’t going to be the reason a crack-head popped up into her nephew's life on top of that.

Watching Daire spiral out of control in the following years after Kathy’s departure had been ugly to watch. Watching him try to crawl out of that dark pit of addiction only to fall back down it again. Watching the Donelly’s almost fall apart trying to help the man keep himself together. The amount of times he presented in A&E. She had lost count of how many times when she had been caring for him that she had feared that that day was going to be his last.

And then one day when Michelle was nearly seven he had been brought in again and when she had seen him, she had genuinely thought that he was dead. His lips were blue and there was no sign of his chest moving. If it hadn’t been for the monitor that someone had managed to attach then she genuinely would have thought he had died.

She had gotten the whole story from the nurse who was caring for him before they had shifted him up to the intensive care unit an hour later. He had overdosed on God only knows what and had collapsed in the middle of the street as a result. The people who had found him had discovered him frothing at the mouth and had actually thought that the man was possessed.

Well he was possessed alright. Possessed by whatever drugs he could get his hands on.

X

She hadn’t seen Daire ever since then. The Donnelly’s packed him off to a hospital in Belfast to get him clean as soon as he was well enough to be transferred and nobody had seen or really heard from him since. Apparently he did manage to get clean though and managed to get some fancy job as well, but all the information anyone got came from the Donnelly’s and not himself.

It was probably for the best that she had never told him, she had decided shortly after he had left Derry for good. He hadn’t been fit to raise a child in that state. As soon as Kathy left he had fallen down into drugs hard and by the time she had known about James he was well in their grip. At least now he could focus on getting better. Whether or not he truly did though nobody really knew for sure.

A few months afterwards all thoughts of Daire had left her mind. Unfortunately for James it did seem like he had drawn the short straw when it came to parents. A mother who was cold and cared for no one but herself and a junkie for a father. She could only hope and pray that Kathy’s Paul was a decent sort. At least then if that was the case then James could have some stability and a hopefully caring parent in his life as well.

Christ, if she hadn’t been planning on going through with the abortion then Kathy should have just given James to her parents to raise. They would have loved the opportunity; her da in particular had always wanted a boy to carry on the Maguire name. Even now they couldn’t help but worry over him and they went over every year to check up on him under the guise of visiting. Christ, she and Martin would have taken James in too even though they also had Michelle to care for. 

They were family after all and family looked out for each other.

And who knows maybe Daire wouldn’t have turned to drugs in the first place if he had known that he was going to have a child to raise?

If only Kathy had thought to leave James in Derry.

X

Well that thought came back to bite her a few years down the line.

Because one Sunday in the beginning of August sixteen years later, guess who rocked up on her doorstep shortly after they had returned from Mass but Kathy herself. With James in tow, thank God, and a whole manner of suitcases.

Her reason for returning? She was divorcing Paul and so had decided to come back ‘home’.

She wondered if she could get away with only taking James in and chucking Kathy over to stay with their parents.

Probably not, Kathy was going to be her problem for the foreseeable future.

For feck’s sake.

But then Kathy pissed off back to London one month later without a single word of goodbye to herself or her son. All she had gotten was a fucking phone call when her sister was at the airport telling her that she was going. 

God, telling James that his mother had left without even saying goodbye had been fucking hard. The look on his face made her want to wish that the blasted plane had crashed into the fucking sea. He didn’t cry, good lad, but the hurt was clear to see. 

And her sister's lack of care for her child almost knocked her down. For fuck’s sake, she had actually left her English-raised son in the most divided city in Northern Ireland. He had to go to Michelle’s school instead of the Catholic Boys Secondary for his own safety! And it didn’t matter that he was a Catholic, or that he had Irish parents, the second he spoke it made him a target. He could never go out on his own, something she made sure to drum into Michelle’s head. The last thing she wanted was to bury her nephew.

That night when Kathy had left she had sat down on the sofa with Martin and her parents lost in thought over what to do. She didn’t mind having James there with them, she truly didn’t, but she couldn’t help but wonder if the Donnellys might see him and put two and two together. That was a problem that she hadn’t thought of until then. It was no secret all those years ago that Kathy Maguire had left Derry to go to England for an abortion after all. The father’s identity though, was a mystery that everyone loved to discuss back when it happened with Daire’s name popping up a few times. She just hoped that nobody would be talking about it in front of James now; she really didn’t want to answer those questions that he’ll undoubtedly have just yet.

The only people that she knew definitely knew that the child was Daire’s was herself, Martin and Daire. Not even her parents knew. Whether Daire had told his family she had no idea. 

X

So off to London Kathy had gone to work on setting up a business that apparently meant more to her than her own child and James stayed in Derry. And she had no problems with him apart from the English thing. He was quiet and polite and helpful around the house. Michelle’s opposite so to speak. She had actually hoped a little that her nephews personality might rub off on Michelle, but of fucking course it had to be Michelle rubbing off on James. From dead nuns, to decapitating statues to digging up dead dogs, she just didn’t know how they got themselves into those situations. And he was starting to grow a backbone in relation to Michelle’s taunts, even managing to catch her off-guard with one or two of his own in a rare moment. And she noticed that some Irish slang was starting to slip into his speech.

They’d beat the English out of him yet.

It made her proud.

X

She was jolted out of her thoughts by the sound of footsteps pounding down the stairs. A second later Michelle appeared in the kitchen, James right behind her. Both of them had their jackets on and she thought that she could hear something ‘clink’ in Michelle’s bag.

“Right Mammy we’re off,” Michelle said, hefting her bag up around her shoulder, while James shifted on his feet behind her. “We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Don’t go getting into trouble now you two” she warned even though she felt like it was a lost cause even as she said it. Trouble seemed to follow those wains around like it was an official member of their little group.

“Yes Aunty Deirdre” James said, and she knew that he would at least try. Him and the Devlin lass had that in common. Michelle on the other hand just shrugged and muttered something that could be taken as an agreement before she swung around on her heel and started to shove James out the door in front of her. A few seconds later she heard the door open and slam shut and silence filled the house for the first time since she arrived back.

Sighing to herself she reached into the cupboard behind her to pull out the bottle of whiskey and top up her glass. 

No, she wouldn’t say anything just yet. She had no clue just what Daire was like right now and she had promised herself after Kathy had left the first time and basically abandoned James without even a goodbye that she would be there for him. She wasn’t an emotional woman and she didn’t have time or patience for any of that usually. But for Michelle - and now James, she would be there for them if they needed her.

James needed stability not to be thrown into a life with a stranger he didn’t know all over again. A stranger who was possibly still on drugs. James was happy here. 

Deirdre loved having him and Martin didn’t mind either. Her parents were thrilled of course to have their grandson living close to them now and away from Kathy. Michelle and James seemed to have had a rocky start but Michelle had never had a particularly pleasant personality to begin with. And if she hadn’t wanted him around her then she undoubtedly would have made that clear. Like herself, Michelle hid the fact the she cared for people behind a cold exterior (and if she walked into her home the morning after the President’s speech and Kathy’s departure to see her daughter and nephew asleep on the sofa, with Michelle holding onto James as if she was scared he would disappear if she didn’t, well, Deirdre would take that to her grave). James was family way more than Kathy had ever been and family looked out for each other.

James was safe and happy here with his family. No one in Derry knew who James father was bar her, Martin and the soon to be returned Daire. He might protest that he was James' father but he had no proof. Nobody really bothered with the ‘wee English fella’ as they called him to speculate about who gave him the other half of his DNA anymore. And Kathy wasn’t coming back anytime soon to confirm or deny anything. 

She wasn’t a very sentimental woman but family looked out for each other. And James was part of their family. Not Daire Donnelly’s.


End file.
